It takes a strong person to stand up for the underdog. Especially when you truly don’t know them, just what you see on social media and prior encounters. But luckily they do exists. Sad to say it’s a comparison to seeing a mythical creature or a ghost… You truly don’t believe until you see it for yourself. I think highly of these people. Modern day hero to stand up for someone when other people are bringing them down. They are as rare as winning the lottery. I’m glad to have heard that somone that I don’t even speak to but probably once a year had the heart to put another person in check, tell them that they are wrong about me and they shouldn’t make assumptions. That is heroic if you ask me. Plus, to their own close friend.
I’d like to say thank you, even tho, thank you is not enough. It takes a strong mind and a beautiful heart to stand up to someone. Truly, thank you.
This morning, very early I was having sharp pain in my chest and I had a very bad headache. I personally thought I was having an anxiety attack because I had them before. This one was different. I was light headed and short of breath. I went to the hospital to find out after a physical and a few tests I had a mild stroke. I didn’t even know what a stroke really was until today and how they are caused. Stress, the main factor. I have congenital heart defects that are basically holes in my heart that cause the heart to work twice as hard to pump the blood through my body, another factor to a stroke, I guess. Lack of sleep (I haven’t slept right in years) and lack of nutrition (I forget to eat sometimes). Being a single mom to a autistic 3 year old and working two jobs trying to keep the lights on (literally) has finally caught up with me. I’m drained, tired and burnt out. Then you have add a social life that proves that no one cares. I have family that don’t care, and I have people who claim to be friends (not you Kookie, I know you love me).
It makes me depressed. Like I can’t survive here, I wasn’t meant to. 3 months ago I had surgery to remove the cancer in my body that will more than likely keep me from having more kids. That’s ok tho. Having a child with autism is like having 5 kids in one. Not complaining. If you know me then you know how much I love my son, he’s my world and I can’t function without him, but I am human and I get tired. I want to find peace. I need to have a day to myself where I’m not a mom, a worker, a long distance wife, a sister, a daughter or even a friend. I need to just get away and find myself again and forget the world around me. I need to find ME again. I’ve totally lost who I am anymore. I feel like I don’t live for me but for everyone else. And, that’s a really bad feeling.
What a mind fuck…
Open up to a person and they make you feel comfortable enough to then change their personality. Total mind fuck. Respect my silence because you done it to yourself. 😒
I swear to The Lord above, people hate to see me smile. But, that’s what makes me so confident and I’ll continue being that way.
— Tera Castillo
Inappropriate and non-professional.
Today I get a call from the cook at my new job. He’s super cool, even tho he hits on me and he’s twice my age 😑 but, whatever. He’s nice and the only one that seems to be alright. Anyway, he told me that on Saturday after I worked the owner said, “I went from a hero to a zero” because I didn’t clean a table. It wasn’t my table and I’m not a waitress… I’m a bartender. The cook cleared my name and basically said, HEY, she helped us out. She wasn’t tried to waitress but to bartend, and that wasn’t her table. It was someone else’s.
What I’m saying is, is that grounds to quit? Hero to a zero? I found that insulting beyond control. I won’t work at another place that feel as if I owe them to work there. I understand that small businesses are peoples livelihoods and want things done their way, but be respectful. I found that statement to be very inappropriate and sooooo insulting, if I didn’t do it or did. I don’t have shit to prove to anyone and I’ll be damned if I get treated like a bitch, again.
When the bitch gets called out!
Omg, made my day. I get a call from a friend asking what my previous managers number is, I send it to her and asked why it was needed. No matter, I’d give it to her anyway. The same manager that tried to accuse me of stealing wrote a ton of bad checks to her bar. Hummmmm… SHE GOT CALLED OUT! Lmfao, swear, karma I love you!
Ignorance pt. 2
So, where was I? Oh, my former “boss”. Upon leaving the place I felt used. Like, the only time she was kind to me was because she didn’t have her friends with her sitting at the bar. And of course, when she did she used me to make it sound like she had a puppet with her the puppeteer. Slamming her shot glass on the bar is THE biggest disrespect as a bartender. If I had a dollar ever time she did it in front of costumers is wouldn’t have to work for a while, which, gave them room to disrespect me also…. and they did. When I told the owner how they treated me or said to me she would say that it was a lie. Being that she was her SB, and the pussy control the world status, who’d he believe? Fucked up ain’t it.
Anyway, people have seen me and told me that they have no reason to ever go back and if I bartend local, they better know when I do lol. That’s an awesome feeling to know that the people who agreed I was treated poorly by her and even tho it’s not at the same place they’d still make the trip to come see me.
Latest rumor, I was fired and she’s talking hell of shit as to the people that I’m employed with now. Fuck that bitch hahaha pathetic.
Little bitch don’t know how funny she is :).
So I quit my job a few weeks ago and for many reasons. For one really good reason, I damn near almost cried leaving for work most days. I hated it that much and it was mostly my manager the thief, the liar and the user-manipulator. It’s sad, the owner I thought of like a father has helped me get on my feet as soon as I started working there. I thought my manager was that good hearted also, but no, she wasn’t. I honestly think she believes her own lies or the pills and coke finally got the best of what’s left of her mind.
A week prior to me walking off the job I was talking with my husband about how I hated it there. If I could get out of it, I would. For months I’d cry before leaving for work. I’d get half way there and get myself together because I work face to face with costumers. I truly found out something about myself and that is I have an amazing poker face. You’ll never know how I’m truly feeling. I could be crying outside my job in my car and walk in there like the world is bliss and I have the beat life ever. I honestly just tried to make the best of it.
I was the only non-relative who worked there. The manager hired all her sons to work there. So no matter how hard I worked or how good I’ve done I’d never get any credit for it. A costumer treated me poorly- who cares. A costumer looked at her son wrong and OMG, THEY ARE NEVER ALLOWED BACK! She would get drunk at the bar all night long. Play on her phone lol which one of her many complaints was I was on mine, and yeah I was lol but she was also.
To be continued…
If I ever have a little girl 💟
"To say I love you, and to my best friend. You’ve always had my back, and I’ll always have yours."
I love flowers 🌼
Thank you for making me smile! ☺️ @j_cast85
When the tears hit me lol. #facebookIs10 #thanks for making me ball my eyes out with your corny music lol. #HappyBirthdayFacebook
Yayyyy football, I don’t care lol I’m with my girls and I I have tequila… Life is good 🍹💋👑🌸
New to my huge collection. I have an sweet addiction to perfumes 🌸 #mariahcarey #playboy